Archive for the 'Music' Category

Friday, January 1st, 2010

And now let us welcome the new year
Full of things that have never been.


Full moon, blue moon.

New year is the cleansing antidote to Christmas. After 2,000 years of spiritual baggage, decades (or generations) of family dynamics, and numbing social obligations, new year belongs to the individual. We move back into our own space, our own bodies, our adult perspective on the world. No wonder we feel like celebrating our freedom.

My date says while he appreciates the symbolic marking of time, nothing changes at midnight. “We’re going to wake up tomorrow with the same problems.” His focus is on the external forces, his disbelief in magical influences. He doesn’t want to be fooled by the champagne and noise and expensive food. Doesn’t even want to participate except as a social obligation.

But the new year is internal, it’s about renewed energy and belief in ourselves. It’s the feeling after confession, or a productive therapy session, or a week at a spa. The world isn’t different, we are.

I recently reconnected with a new year’s date from my college years. Back then we were too young to drink, too poor to pay for a dinner. So we showed up at 11 pm at the converted factory just to dance (sadly, it was the disco era, not much I can do about the soundtrack of this memory).

That night still rates as the best new year’s eve I ever had. Maybe because it was the first time I was out in the world as (almost) an adult. Maybe because he and I were in sync that night, there were no unanswered questions. And, at that stage of our lives, no real problems.

What surprised me is that, after all these years, he views that night the same way. After traveling the world, living in exotic locations, and many more relationships, he also remembers the night, what I wore, how it felt. And yes, there was an innocence then that can’t be recaptured, but I believe that it’s still possible to revive part of that feeling that there are better days ahead. And it’s not too late.

This is your night tonight, everything’s gonna be alright.

12th house moon

Friday, October 9th, 2009

Depending on whom you read, the signs for today were revealing or apocalyptic (or both). I woke up rather dreading the day, because on top of all the portents, it was a Gemini moon, my own personal monthly Friday the 13th (which in itself is a good day for me, being my birthday). But I had to laugh when I saw the news about the Nobel Peace prize. It’s an excellent reminder that it’s all just energy - and one person’s apocalypse nowish is someone else’s elysian field. The mind is its own place.

I was worried about seeing the vet this evening. Jazz has been doing very well on his home cooked diet, his energy and appetite are great, he has slimmed down. But he’s begun to have urinary accidents in the house. Not during the day while I’m gone, but in the evening when he’s excited about dinner, or in the morning when I can’t get him outside soon enough. I was concerned that he’d gotten worse, quickly, or that we had a new health problem to deal with. His general physical was fine, and we’ll have blood and urinalysis results in a few days.

Unfortunately, they couldn’t get all the tests because he fought them off. The technician was laughing, she said three of them couldn’t hold Jazz down and he was very feisty for a dog his age. It’s a good sign. I guess we all reach an age where we’ve had enough and just want to be left alone.

Walk on Water

Saturday, September 12th, 2009

So today. Huge project that should have been done 6 months ago absolutely needs to be done today. Trying to stay out of emergency mode, stay centered, not let my brain undermine me -What is wrong with you, why didn’t you do it earlier, maybe you can’t do it, what if you do it wrong, maybe you can get an extension, let’s eat some pasta first…

The anxiety has taken over, I’m shaking and I can’t breathe.

This gives me the opportunity to try some of the tactics I’ve been studying.

Stay in the now - don’t beat yourself up for what you didn’t do, or worry about the outcome. One step at a time.

Visualize victory - ground yourself, close your eyes, and imagine the finish. Completely, not just visually. Tastes, sounds, smells, textures. I’m an auditory learner, imagining people congratulating/applauding me goes further than other symbols. For some people a reward works better.

Do it for yourself - Not because it’s being forced upon you. Not because life sucks and this is another example and another bad day. It’s something that’s blocking your energy - a clogged drain, weeds in your garden - and clearing it is going to feel great.

I am doing this…

I’ll check in tonight with my progress. In the meantime, one of my theme songs suits this day -

David Byrne - Walk on Water [you tube link]

Wake up - the house is shaking
Get up - the dead awaken
Let go - you know that you can
Get up - you sleepy babies
Hello - you naked ladies
Walk on - you know that you can

Look into the Eyeball

Train Song

Thursday, September 10th, 2009

More motivation music, leaving one life behind and starting another. Something compelling about it. The demon lover as an aspect of oneself.

I went up to the window and I held out my hand
He’s a demon lover and a spiritual man
I’m in trouble cause I’ve been watching,
Watching in your bedroom window
That’s the train I’m catching

Music and exercise

Wednesday, September 9th, 2009

This blog is evolving into music appreciation rather than meditation….although it’s still all energy and altered brain waves.

I was a dancer and a tennis player – my natural rhythms don’t work with a treadmill. I lunge, sprint, bounce (the coach nicknamed me the human backboard, I was quick and I’d go for anything). But a ruined knee (Route 1 commute with a clutch) precludes that now. So (sigh) treadmill.

And I thought I’d share a hard-earned tip. Probably not original to me but I haven’t read it anywhere. I noticed that if I used the manual/quick start mode, and adjusted the speed/incline to each song, I worked out twice as long, and burned 30% more calories per minute. Using the pre-set workouts often resulted in times when the rhythm of the workout didn’t match the beat of the music, or my energy level, and I’m thinking now how much that worked against me.

Current favorite - Kate Bush’s Big Sky Meteorological Mix. I can’t link to an MP3, but I found a static youtube video [link].

That cloud is nothing but trouble.

I’m So Open

Monday, September 7th, 2009

Motivation music, enjoy!

Count all wounds that brought you here
Lay your blessings end to end
Rid yourself of all regrets
Because here is where it all begins

-I’m So Open, Cowboy Junkies

Music to Connect - Alzheimer’s

Thursday, September 3rd, 2009

A particularly satisfying article from Prevention Magazine [link] on a daughter’s use of music to connect to her father.

Dog song

Wednesday, September 2nd, 2009

How to deal this week? Stay in the here and now. Think of something simple and pleasurable while tackling these life changing issues.

What you’re fearing hasn’t happened yet and probably won’t.

I have a certain fondness for this song (it’s the ringtone on my cell for people I want to hear from). In June 2004 I was told to spend the weekend by the sea and my next great love would appear. Honestly, I don’t believe that the universe is that direct, but I went anyway (wasn’t exactly a quest, it was a weekend on the beach). What I heard was this song on the clock radio, waking me up one morning. Got me thinking about getting a dog and well….the next year I found Jazz.

The Hard Way

Tuesday, September 1st, 2009

One colleague called it the point of no return, the energy from last week and these next few days (and in a larger sense until November 1). I personally got three very unwelcome get-moving smacks from the universe, the last and worst today. While I know it will all work out and move me into the next phase (the hard way, sadly), wish I’d just done it on my own.

A simple example is the least-complicated of the three events – I’d been saying for months that I needed to complete a horrifically overdue project before I could look for a new job. And of course yesterday the project blew up and moved into emergency status (tarnishing my worker bee halo somewhat). Uncomfortable, yes, but it will be done in a few months and I’ll be free on my own terms. I’m the one who created the barrier, I’ve created the crisis to clear it.

So, in honor of whatever crossroads we’re facing, I’m linking to Modest Mouse’s Float On video [you tube link].

Under the Ivy

Sunday, August 30th, 2009

I sit here in the thunder
The green on the grey
I feel it all around me
And it’s not easy for me
To give away a secret -
It’s not safe

Kate Bush, Hounds of Love

Working with this song right now, thought I’d share three interpretations from youtube. The first is the artist live.


Youtube: Under the Ivy - Kate Bush live

Youtube: Under the Ivy ballet

Youtube: Mourning Sons

Hounds of Love