Archive for the 'Quotes' Category

Conscious convergence

Saturday, July 17th, 2010

July 17-18

From the Common Passion website, a shared intention for these 2 days:

I, as a sovereign being, join together with All That Is to call forth the presence of balance and unity within me and in our world. I am the conscious presence of harmony and reconciliation and I am grateful for the wholeness I bring forth in this and every moment. And so it is.

And now for a comment on Christianity

Thursday, January 21st, 2010

I read my new year’s day rumination in a creative writing group. One of our best writers did not like my metaphor of a person carrying “2000 years of spiritual baggage.” An individual, she said, cannot carry 2000 years of baggage.

The rest of the group cracked up. You obviously don’t have any fundamentalist family/friends, they laughed.

CS Lewis: There are two kinds of people: those who say to God, “Thy will be done,” and those to whom God says, “All right, then, have it your way.”

A Request

Thursday, January 14th, 2010

The father of my friend died yesterday afternoon. He never regained consciousness from a surgery before the holiday, and the brain damage was too great. They had to let him go. But it was too early and he was too young.

I ask you for prayers, energy, light - whatever you can send to his family, and to him on his journey. His name is Charles.

To me the honour is sufficient of belonging to the universe — such a great universe, and so grand a scheme of things. Not even Death can rob me of that honour. For nothing can alter the fact that I have lived; I have been I, if for ever so short a time. And when I am dead, the matter which composes my body is indestructible—and eternal, so that come what may to my ‘Soul,’ my dust will always be going on, each separate atom of me playing its separate part — I shall still have some sort of a finger in the pie. When I am dead, you can boil me, burn me, drown me, scatter me — but you cannot destroy me: my little atoms would merely deride such heavy vengeance. Death can do no more than kill you. - Barbellion

Friday, January 1st, 2010

And now let us welcome the new year
Full of things that have never been.


Full moon, blue moon.

New year is the cleansing antidote to Christmas. After 2,000 years of spiritual baggage, decades (or generations) of family dynamics, and numbing social obligations, new year belongs to the individual. We move back into our own space, our own bodies, our adult perspective on the world. No wonder we feel like celebrating our freedom.

My date says while he appreciates the symbolic marking of time, nothing changes at midnight. “We’re going to wake up tomorrow with the same problems.” His focus is on the external forces, his disbelief in magical influences. He doesn’t want to be fooled by the champagne and noise and expensive food. Doesn’t even want to participate except as a social obligation.

But the new year is internal, it’s about renewed energy and belief in ourselves. It’s the feeling after confession, or a productive therapy session, or a week at a spa. The world isn’t different, we are.

I recently reconnected with a new year’s date from my college years. Back then we were too young to drink, too poor to pay for a dinner. So we showed up at 11 pm at the converted factory just to dance (sadly, it was the disco era, not much I can do about the soundtrack of this memory).

That night still rates as the best new year’s eve I ever had. Maybe because it was the first time I was out in the world as (almost) an adult. Maybe because he and I were in sync that night, there were no unanswered questions. And, at that stage of our lives, no real problems.

What surprised me is that, after all these years, he views that night the same way. After traveling the world, living in exotic locations, and many more relationships, he also remembers the night, what I wore, how it felt. And yes, there was an innocence then that can’t be recaptured, but I believe that it’s still possible to revive part of that feeling that there are better days ahead. And it’s not too late.

This is your night tonight, everything’s gonna be alright.

Unstable leaders

Saturday, October 17th, 2009

“Humans are the only animals who will follow unstable pack leaders.” - Cesar Millan

“There is a kind of heroism for which there are no medals because it is unmentionable. It is that of the subordinate stoically following a leader whom he knows is taking him to disaster.”
- Huntford

What do you owe the person who is paying your salary? Your best work? The quantity of work that you feel they are paying for? The quality of work you feel that they deserve?

My first formal performance review in years was more abstract than concrete. Crying the economy, there was truly no chance of any raise. With money off the table, and no chance of any promotion in a horizontally-organized small business, the review was an exercise in negotiating expectations on both sides.

My review was quite good - overall better than I expected, because management freely admits that they are never satisfied. But the one thing they want me to do is to play to the owner, to manage his view of me. I’m ruminating on that today. If I’m doing the work but the owner doesn’t think so, is there a sound? If I play to him but don’t respect him, what does that mean? We’ve got a standoff here - both of us waiting to the other to prove their worth.

Since I have to leave anyway . . . . my coach says management is “abusive and narcissistic;” my guides say I was there to learn about how people abuse their power - and that I’ve learned the lesson and can get out of there at any time. (For a long time I worked for someone who was truly abusive, a screaming, bipolar genius whom I at least respected and learned from.)

Since I have to leave anyway, do I put the effort in so they’ll be more sorry to see me leave? Where do I put my energy?

The Last Place on Earth (Modern Library Exploration)

12th house moon

Friday, October 9th, 2009

Depending on whom you read, the signs for today were revealing or apocalyptic (or both). I woke up rather dreading the day, because on top of all the portents, it was a Gemini moon, my own personal monthly Friday the 13th (which in itself is a good day for me, being my birthday). But I had to laugh when I saw the news about the Nobel Peace prize. It’s an excellent reminder that it’s all just energy - and one person’s apocalypse nowish is someone else’s elysian field. The mind is its own place.

I was worried about seeing the vet this evening. Jazz has been doing very well on his home cooked diet, his energy and appetite are great, he has slimmed down. But he’s begun to have urinary accidents in the house. Not during the day while I’m gone, but in the evening when he’s excited about dinner, or in the morning when I can’t get him outside soon enough. I was concerned that he’d gotten worse, quickly, or that we had a new health problem to deal with. His general physical was fine, and we’ll have blood and urinalysis results in a few days.

Unfortunately, they couldn’t get all the tests because he fought them off. The technician was laughing, she said three of them couldn’t hold Jazz down and he was very feisty for a dog his age. It’s a good sign. I guess we all reach an age where we’ve had enough and just want to be left alone.

Lies and omissions

Tuesday, October 6th, 2009

People have been lying to me lately at work. The difference is that now I know it.

A lot of us go to Anne. She’s much more dramatic in her writing than she is in her readings, where she tends to be more direct. I like her readings because she doesn’t coddle - You chose this, now it’s time to rise to the occasion.

But sometimes in her writings, she has a moment of clarity, a focus. And for last week:

See the reason why the lies were offered - to help you get where you are now. Now that you see their purpose, you can proceed with the rest of your life, understanding that the lies got you to where you are. Sometimes when people lie, they do so to hide things because they are ashamed or afraid. And other times, they lie to deceive. In this case, the lie was to help you see something that you needed to see. So thank them for their lie or untruth and use it to fuel your path forward. If you look, there is an open door that you are supposed to go through. It’s not where you thought you would go, it’s not how you thought it would happen, but there is a door open.

Just look around, there’s an open door somewhere. Go through that open door. The dream is still there, it’s just not with this person. The dream is still good, it’s just not in the form you thought it was going to be in. Doesn’t make it a bad dream. It just is different than you thought it would be. Follow the dream! See it clearly and go through the open door, in a different direction than you thought you were going to go.

Saturn & Pluto

Monday, September 28th, 2009

Have to share this quote from Anne Ortelee about the astrological aspects right now -

And trying to be friendly with Saturn and Pluto is like trying to hang out with a mugger and a killer, hoping they’ll never do it again.

Yeah, sounds like my job.

Energy connections, part 1

Friday, September 25th, 2009

Work was brutal this week. Concern trolls. Vague accusations. Responsibility without authority. Sucked into hoping that someone could learn, be better, only to be betrayed. Maybe the worst week of my working life, but not for anything identifiable, more for a feeling of – this is unacceptable. Is this really a connection I want to have now?

It’s been a bizarre two months. I’ve learned that people that I felt were in my life, didn’t feel the same. Lies and omissions. People who were important to me – well, I wasn’t important to them. It’s – a revelation. Someone actually moved away without saying goodbye. House empty. I’m not so much hurt by all this as dumbfounded. And then feeling naive about my relationships.

I step off the train, I’m walking down your street again,
And past your door, but you don’t live here any more
It’s years since you’ve been here
And now you’ve disappeared somewhere
Like outer space you’ve found some better place

I have a karmic friend, and he often uses this quote to sum up our 30 year long-distance friendship:

If I never saw you again
It wouldn’t make a difference
You didn’t say it wouldn’t matter
You said it wouldn’t make a difference

And did you know I understand the nuance?

Venus Trines at Midnight: Love Poems from Linda Goodman

More on all this later….

The Red Book

Saturday, September 19th, 2009

Article in NY Times about the upcoming publication of Carl Jung’s personal Liber Novus:

The Holy Grail of the Unconscious

Interesting to me as I went through therapy that concentrated on dream analysis (although not Jungian, more Kaballah), I carried my battered notebook with me to NYC once a month - pages and pages of evolving stories. Also working on a memoir that sometimes scares me.

This article quotes Jung’s advice to a woman about her own dream book:

“I should advise you to put it all down as beautifully as you can — in some beautifully bound book,” Jung instructed. “It will seem as if you were making the visions banal — but then you need to do that — then you are freed from the power of them. . . . Then when these things are in some precious book you can go to the book & turn over the pages & for you it will be your church — your cathedral — the silent places of your spirit where you will find renewal. If anyone tells you that it is morbid or neurotic and you listen to them — then you will lose your soul — for in that book is your soul.”