Archive for September, 2009


Friday, September 11th, 2009

Because there is no power without knowledge, and no knowledge without pain…

-Merlin, The Hollow Hills by Mary Stewart

Mary Stewart’s Merlin Trilogy

Train Song

Thursday, September 10th, 2009

More motivation music, leaving one life behind and starting another. Something compelling about it. The demon lover as an aspect of oneself.

I went up to the window and I held out my hand
He’s a demon lover and a spiritual man
I’m in trouble cause I’ve been watching,
Watching in your bedroom window
That’s the train I’m catching

Music and exercise

Wednesday, September 9th, 2009

This blog is evolving into music appreciation rather than meditation….although it’s still all energy and altered brain waves.

I was a dancer and a tennis player – my natural rhythms don’t work with a treadmill. I lunge, sprint, bounce (the coach nicknamed me the human backboard, I was quick and I’d go for anything). But a ruined knee (Route 1 commute with a clutch) precludes that now. So (sigh) treadmill.

And I thought I’d share a hard-earned tip. Probably not original to me but I haven’t read it anywhere. I noticed that if I used the manual/quick start mode, and adjusted the speed/incline to each song, I worked out twice as long, and burned 30% more calories per minute. Using the pre-set workouts often resulted in times when the rhythm of the workout didn’t match the beat of the music, or my energy level, and I’m thinking now how much that worked against me.

Current favorite - Kate Bush’s Big Sky Meteorological Mix. I can’t link to an MP3, but I found a static youtube video [link].

That cloud is nothing but trouble.

Tuesday, September 8th, 2009

Thanks to everyone who responded to the poem on September 5. Apparently I need to clarify something - the poem is not about my husband. It’s about someone who is, I believe, still in this world. Just underwater for now.

I’m So Open

Monday, September 7th, 2009

Motivation music, enjoy!

Count all wounds that brought you here
Lay your blessings end to end
Rid yourself of all regrets
Because here is where it all begins

-I’m So Open, Cowboy Junkies

Monday, September 7th, 2009

Last fall, I lost a significant amount of weight, almost effortlessly. A tweak here and there in my food intake, more cardio, and voila. Unfortunately, right after that, stress descended in the form of my micromanaging boss. Because she has no other management skills, she went into emergency mode, decided to manage our time, moment by moment. (I blame myself, in an moment of what I thought was extreme exaggeration, I told someone she would never be happy until she reviewed our to-do lists every day, put the list into the order that she wanted, and had us submit our accomplishments at the end of the day. Welcome to the 5th dimension.) I am a manager, but I have absolutely no authority or control over my day. My stress-cortisol skyrocketed, along with my weight, back up to where it was. I refer to it (fondly?) as my Casey-weight, named after her.

On top of that, her guilt caused her to constantly bring food into the office and force it on us. Bagels, pancakes, cookies, cakes. And to make myself feel better, I was running next door for a latte every day, I needed the comfort of cream and the motivation of caffeine.

I’ve spent the last year complaining to my therapist – how do I keep her from derailing me, day after day? That’s a discussion for another day, but let’s narrow it down to my health, my weight, or more accurately, my stress.

A month ago I entered into a health contest with a friend, with a significant reward/penalty (deadline December 1). I tweaked my diet, increased my time at the health club – and nothing. Not this time. I’m perplexed, like someone who’s pressing an elevator button with no response.

Maybe this time I have to take the stairs.

I’m going to test out some things that I’ve been reading, about affirmations, law of attraction, and creative visualization. Here we go.

Van Praagh

Sunday, September 6th, 2009

Planning for this year’s Mind Body Spirit expo [link], a lot of discussion about the major attraction – Van Praagh [link]. I’ll be blogging the expo but will probably not attend the Van Praagh event, only because I already attended his joint session with Brian Weiss [link] sponsored by Omega [link].

That session, in NYC, was a great deal of fun. Colleagues of mine (including my cancer surgeon) have attended the Van Praagh/Weiss cruises (out of my price range, I’m afraid). Van Praagh and Weiss don’t take themselves too seriously, there’s a matter-of-factness from them that I’ve experienced in the better healers/mediums that I’ve encountered. No big deal. Nothing mysterious. Just energy and concentration. You could do it yourself if you wanted to (but you don’t have to). Weiss is dry, professorial, Van Praagh is easy-going and does a wicked (but fond) Weiss impersonation.

I’ll blog about the Weiss session later. Van Praagh, besides picking up messages for various audience members, led us through a psychic exercise. Pairing up with a stranger, we give them a personal object and see what they can read from it. The woman seated behind me gave me a nondescript ring (not wedding or engagement), and I felt something like a sisterhood, a sorority, and educational. Turns out she was a Catholic nun who taught in a women’s college.

I handed her my opal earring – one of my last anniversary gifts from my late husband. She got a male presence with an urgent message for me – We’re still connected.

So I’m not attending Van Praagh this year – others deserve their chance. I got the message.

Unfinished Business: What the Dead Can Teach Us About Life

Ghosts Among Us: Uncovering the Truth About the Other Side

Talking to Heaven: A Medium’s Message of Life After Death

Heaven and Earth: Making the Psychic Connection

Reaching to Heaven

Meditations with James Van Praagh

Healing Grief: Reclaiming Life After Any Loss

Saturday, September 5th, 2009

I was waiting for you to resurface
You sank into the waves years ago
In a self-sacrificing moment
But I believed that you would survive
I believed
I dreamed you were swimming toward the light
I reached out my hand to pull you to shore
I can’t
I can’t believe that you haven’t emerged

Music to Connect - Alzheimer’s

Thursday, September 3rd, 2009

A particularly satisfying article from Prevention Magazine [link] on a daughter’s use of music to connect to her father.

Dog song

Wednesday, September 2nd, 2009

How to deal this week? Stay in the here and now. Think of something simple and pleasurable while tackling these life changing issues.

What you’re fearing hasn’t happened yet and probably won’t.

I have a certain fondness for this song (it’s the ringtone on my cell for people I want to hear from). In June 2004 I was told to spend the weekend by the sea and my next great love would appear. Honestly, I don’t believe that the universe is that direct, but I went anyway (wasn’t exactly a quest, it was a weekend on the beach). What I heard was this song on the clock radio, waking me up one morning. Got me thinking about getting a dog and well….the next year I found Jazz.